THEME

ex0skeletal:

Fun shark attack facts:

  • In 1996, toilets injured 43,000 Americans a year. Sharks injured 13.
  • In 1996, 2,600 Americans were injured by room fresheners. Sharks injured 13.
  • In 1996, buckets and pails injured almost 11,000 Americans. Sharks injured 13.
  • For every human killed by a shark, humans kill approximately two million sharks.

Conclusions:

  1. Humans are assholes.
  2. Sharks are not assholes.
  3. Apparently everyone in 1996 lived in a real-life infomercial.

today my professor told me
every cell in our entire body
is destroyed and replaced
every seven years.

how comforting it is to know
one day i will have a body
you will have never touched.

refinedmind:

Just before nightfall I decided to take a walk outside. The sky was low, enveloping any object in its reach. It formed a dull, purplish haze - like nothing I’d seen before. The streets were empty. Not a single soul was out. It was oddly peaceful - imagining I was the only one left.

auwgh-shet:

princeowl:

bioshock infinite: horseverse

They look so fuckin pissed like “well now were horses.”

@

thegirlunderthefloor:

skyrim + fantastic beasts

thegirlunderthefloor:

skyrim + fantastic beasts

narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”